I don’t know what I will be writing in this week’s newsletter. Honestly, I have taken a break from the newsletter without any thought. I was just busy with my exams and then I had problems with connectivity and the internet for some time and without realizing it had been several weeks since I sat down and wrote. It’s not like I was busy procrastinating rather I was busy reading some books and working on my stories and novel and my Instagram writer account. The past few weeks had been a lot.
Now that I think of it, I suppose the past few months since the beginning of my 4th year at med school have been more mysterious, dramatic, and thoughtful than any other. Recently I had been to a wedding and one of the relatives pointed out that I had turned a lot more serious than the last time we met. I think it was about 3-4 years since we talked face-to-face like that.
I was also busy traveling between different cities, visiting here to check up on my grandparents the other to take my final exams, and then another to attend a wedding. That’s not complete though, I have been traveling through my stories and novels too, to landscapes I am familiar with but thoughts and perspectives that had been abstract till now. While reading books well particularly the classics I was able to go into depth behind the quotes that I would see now and then on Instagram.
Here is something I wrote in one of my ongoing WIPs;
What amount of disillusionment and hopelessness would be necessary to drive a person to this? In my opinion nothing, they were just cowards and threw away everything that was there to strive for. One cannot be bored enough to start taking drugs. Bored? Is that the right word? It’s been a while since I got bored. No, I have been bored for a while now. Today I wasn’t bored though. She had come up and struck up a conversation. Besides, that red scarf she wore was beautiful and caught my attention. It wasn’t that she didn’t interest me, but what I thought of her didn’t make any difference at the start and I remained indifferent to her like I was with others, though I think that didn’t sit right with her and now we have come to this, to go to an amusement park. I suppose it’s been a year and we have made progress, but at the end of the day, it doesn’t make any difference. My fate was long sealed and there’s nothing anyone can do.
I think it won’t be that engaging to some of you so I will share another piece that is a bit more philosophical.
If a man is truly sick, no reason, no consequence, and no loss can stop him. Such a man is beyond redemption and all you can do is watch as he lunges forward. This man gives up on life, and that is a sin. His sin is being afraid and throwing off his courage, he rejects God, and he rejects sanity, he rejects everything there is and he rejects death too. His punishment too is feasible then that death rejects him, and he ends up killing himself for eternity.
If you guys found anything worthwhile or something that interests you be sure to leave a comment.